What Happened with RAEWEAR

What I realized was rather shocking... I never wanted to own a bikini business... I wanted to own a company that empowered women.

The idea for RAEWEAR started coming together at the end of 2019. I had been working in finance for four years, had moved jobs a year prior and once again found myself in a position where I was seeking deeper fulfillment. My dad was and still is an entrepreneur and I have always found myself inspired to build something of my own. I was feeling boxed in and had an innate urge to create.

While I had always been pretty positive about my body, I saw how many women struggled to feel good in their skin and how finding clothes that fit well was a common struggle for many of us.

I had been living by the beach in LA for two years, spending most of my weekends on the sand in bikinis. Having boobs it was a constant struggle to find a bathing suit that I could actually do anything in but lay down. After many bikini returns and much frustration, I decided to make one myself. I took sewing classes in high school so I bought a sewing machine and made my own bikini. It didn’t turn out half bad… and that started me down a path to solve what I saw as a common struggle.

I was motivated by the opportunity to connect and empower women. To help them own who they are, just as they are. Not needing to change or force themselves into “society’s standards” or “society’s sizes” but simply embracing themselves and how they looked regardless of whether they fit into these predefined “boxes”.

For two years, I poured my heart and soul into RAEWEAR. I did everything from branding, to sourcing, to pattern making, to manufacturing. I met incredible people. Notably Jenn and Esmeralda who became an integral part of RAEWEAR. I funded it all with my own money. It was truly built from scratch. Michael and I even moved downtown to be closer to the sourcing and manufacturing.

We built a size-less system, an app that would measure your body with two photos and send you a bikini that fit your measurements. The bikinis were sturdy, made of a thin scuba material and could easily double as a workout or going out top. It was pretty cool.

After weathering many delays and the storms of COVID, we launched in May of 2021. We received positive feedback. People loved their suits. I had been promoted in my job in finance. I was traveling more and working around the clock. All summer people would ask me, how’s your bikini business? I’d pause, oddly finding myself a little taken aback and would say it was going well. That I was excited.

I began questioning this pause. What was this feeling? At first, I didn’t know. I tried to ignore it. Yet as the feeling grew stronger and stronger, I knew I had to listen. Not six months into launching, I made the hard decision to pause RAEWEAR. I decided I needed to take a step back, to reevaluate why I was feeling this way.

People thought I was crazy. After pouring my heart, soul, and money into something, why would I pause it so soon after launching?

Crazy or not, I chose to listen to myself.

I dove back deep into my yoga practice. I meditated consistently every day. I took more time to be with Michael, my friends and family, time to simply have fun. And I spent a lot of time alone.

I went on my second transformative trip to Costa Rica. I got dirty. I spent time in nature. I fell deeply back in love with myself. I reconnected with my core and the unshakable sense of my own innate power. I was gifted my personal mantra - OM TAT SAT - awareness embraces eternal truth. And I vowed to never let myself stray far from myself again. I became my #1 priority and I promised myself that I would never let that go. I was blessed with teachers and mentors and the beauty of Ayurveda.

What I realized was rather shocking… I never wanted to own a bikini business. I didn't really care about bikinis. I wanted to own a company that empowered women. One that supercharged their sense of self, that awoke their own innate power. Somehow, along the way, I had lost the connection to my initial motivation. And I realized that while I had written down the why, the purpose of RAEWEAR, I had never fully gotten clear on my own why. How did I define my purpose? Why was I still in finance? How did all of these things connect to one another? So.. I continued to pause and take the time to understand exactly that.

I define my dharma, my purpose, as empowering others to connect to their truth to cultivate harmony in their lives. I believe the greatest gift I can give someone is helping them see the full essence of who they are, their truth, and empowering them to align their life with that place.

While the core essence of RAEWEAR was aligned in many ways, manufacturing swimsuits wasn’t quite it. So, while the bikini chapter has been on pause, it’s now officially closing.

As one door closes, another opens…

with love,